Unknown Name; Unknown Number

As a retired person, actor, author, father, musician, home owner…I used to get, on average, ten-twenty calls a day between my cell and home phone. Most of those are unsolicited. I have memorized the pitches. “You said to call back in a few months to see if you needed any remodeling.”  “How high is your electric bill? Do you realize how much you could save with solar.” “Do you own a walk-in tub?”  “When was the last time you had your hearing tested?”

Call Center Training

They always say they are calling from your town, but their accent gives away their true location…somewhere south of Zanzibar or Pago Pago.

I was never afraid of the sales calls (it’s been years since I got an obscene phone call…sigh, those were the days), but got irritated enough with each unwanted interruption to raise my blood pressure several points…until I had a great idea.

Now when I get an unsolicited call, instead of quickly hanging up while the auto dialer clicks in my ear, before the salesperson comes on the line…I wait with glee to mess with their day.

I now answer as another call center, responding to their pitch, with one of my own…”Do you own your own home? Are you tired of repainting every few years? Do you realize how much money you could save with aluminum siding? “When can we come visit to give you an estimate?”

Amazing how quickly they hang up.

By the way, my unsolicited calls have dropped by 50% as the word spreads…and I almost sold siding to one caller from India. Who knows, I may make some money one day.

— Rich Allan, author of the comedy-adventure, “Drafted.”

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